2014.12.08

 

 

轉換與洞察力

  講故事，互相分享，分享和演講是有區別的：分享雙方都有收穫，演講是單行道，還有一種幫助別人的方式，工作回報，過程回報，很容易陷入對結果的回報中，也很容易忘記回報過程，但一定要注意回報的過程，要指出來「這是不錯的嘗試」，或者，「這真是太有趣了」-注重過程。

  這裡有三個M：放大、縮小和構造發明；另外有三個P，第一個P是允許自己為人；第二個P是積極的；第三個P是不經意的，將注意力轉向別處，就是根據自己的意願轉換角度的能力。這種轉換角度的能力是甚麼？這就是我們希望沉浸在當下的一種能力，也正是我們退一步，時間和空間上都退一步，問這樣的問題，「他真的有影響嗎？一年之後呢？或者更長遠來看呢？他真的很重要嗎？」同時隨心所欲地回來，能夠靈活地將思緒拉回來，沉浸於聽一首美妙的歌，或者和我們所愛的人在一起，說起來容易做起來難(但是知難行易呀!)。

  我們可以通過冥想來訓練我們的思想，通過對事物進行認知重建，我們可以訓練我們的思想，使其按照我們的意願來轉換。這裡有應用三個P的例子，第一個P許可接受，你壓力很大，你很沮喪，這些都沒有關係，即使你是一般人也沒有關係。第二件事就是尊重現實，此時有很多事情發生，「尊重現實，現實就是這樣」。第二個P是積極性，有甚麼好處呢？第一個好處就是，做少一點而非做多一點，這是很顯然的一個好處，因為它讓我們去思考。第二個好處就是當時我們想「我們現在又有一可以在課堂講的故事了，一個應用三個P的例子」，分心很簡單。

  一年之後這還會有影響嗎？我在工作前沒有鍛鍊，但同時我對自己說，我仍然希望能活在當下，於是我仍然在學校，再花一些時間，更平靜、更放鬆，將三個P應用於實際生活。允許自己接受他，關注積極的一面。

  最後就是轉換角度的能力，我甚麼時候要退一步問自己，「我現在需要如此傷神嗎？我甚麼時候想沉浸於當下？」我知道這三個P，之後的生活，它能幫助我。其實不是這樣，它更像是一種藥丸，要經常定期服用，也就是說當你每經歷一次困境，就應用三個P。應用的越多，生效就越快。認可、積極、轉換，現在就快很多了，因為我應用它，不斷練習它，所以要不斷地用它，多試幾次。

 

The Ability To Shift Perspective

 

  Telling stories, sharing. The difference between sharing and telling: Sharing, both of us get; telling is one way street. Another way to, to help other people, rewarding effort, rewarding the journey. It is so easy to fall into the track of rewarding outcome, and so easy to forget to reward the journey. But to really focus on rewarding the journey, on pointing out “ oh this was a great attempt” or “this was so much fun doing it”-the process.

  There are the three Ms: Magnifying. Minimizing. And Making-up, inventing. The other way, also have three Ps: the first P is the Permission to be human; The second P is Positive; The third P is Passing, is looking toward other place. Is about the ability to willingly shift perspective. What is this ability to shift perspective? It’s the ability when we want to be immersed in the here and now, in the present. And it’s the ability to , when we want, take a step back, zoom out both in time and in space, and ask the question, “ is this really going to matter? Or in a year? Or in a grand schema of things? Space? Is this really important?” And at the same time, go back almost at will. Have this flexibility to go back and be immersed when listening to a beautiful piece of music, or spending time with people we love. And again, it’s easier said than done.

  Over time, we can train our mind through meditation, through cognitively reframing things. We can train our mind to be able to make that shift almost at will. There an example of the 3-three Ps applies. First P, Permission. Acceptance. So you are stressed. So you are upset. It’s OK to be upset. It’s OK to be stressed. Even you are a general person, it’s all right. The second thing – respect for reality. This time a lot of things are happening. Respect for reality. It is what is. And then move on the Positive. So what’s the benefit here? So the first benefit is –Do less rather than more. So that’s certainly a benefit there. Because it got our thinking about it. The second benefit that we thought about at that moment” oh now we have another story to tell in class. An example of how we are applying the three Ps”. Distraction-very easy.

  Is this really going to matter a year from now that I didn’t exercise before a working, but at the same time, I said to myself ” I still want to be able to enjoy the here and now”. So I took my time, spent time with School. Stayed with here a few more, much more relaxed, much calmer, having applied the three Ps to an actual situation that arose. Permission to be human-acceptance. Focusing on the Positive-benefit finding.

    And finally, the ability to shift perspective, when do I want to zoom out and ask this “ do I need to sweat over it now? And when do I want to be immersed in the here and now?” I know about the three Ps. Now for the rest of my life, it’s going to help me. That’s not how it works. It works much more like a pill that you need to take on a regular basis, meaning if you are going through a difficult time, apply the three Ps. And the more you apply them, the faster it is. Permission. Positive. Perspective. It’s much faster now. Because I used it. Because I practiced it. So use it constantly. Try a few times.