2014.11.20

 

 

 

 

享受過程

我將繼續前進，更進一步了解，享受過程。因此，第一步要能認知，在我們獲得認知之後，探討工作回報觀念，記住我們能在短短幾十小時內，就改變學生和成人思維模式，這些思維模式在他們很小的時候就已經奠定了，思維模式是固定或可塑的，我們的大腦是時刻在變化的，藉由教他們關注過程，關注所付出的努力，而不是結果獲最後的成就，而改變他們的思維模式。

我們自己也可以關注我們付出的努力，關注過程本身，不論他是失敗或成功。主動地去接受，他將永遠是我們的一部份，完美主義者經常會做的一件事，當他們意識到自己是完美主義者時，這讓他們很難過：他們就用完美主義的方式來克服完美主義，也就是說，我會成為一個追求完美與卓越的人，這不會起作用，只是更進一步追求完美主義。但主動地接受意味著，好吧，我仍然是個完美主義者，我可能永遠都會有這方面的性格，但這沒關係。

佛教徒常說的一句話是，通常的情況下，我們稱之為神經官能症，不管是完美主義，對失敗的恐懼，還是經常出現憤怒焦慮，不管我們的問題是甚麼，佛教徒很巧妙地重新定義他，我們要將其視為一種工具，一種成長的工具，一種了解自己的方式，使我們深入挖掘自己，然後得以成長。如此看待，這是成長的機會，了解自我，自我反省的機會，能夠設身處地為別人著想的機會，不論他是甚麼，將其視為一種工具。接受他，然後行動。

下一步，接受他之後就去改變它。我們藉由行為來改變他，這關鍵在於行為。

 

Enjoy the process

I can move forward and enjoy the process, it’s a better understanding. So the first step is awareness. After we have awareness, it’s about going back to notion of rewarding effort. Remember, we were able to change students and adult’s mind set with as little as a few hours. And sometimes, this mind set has been set in them from a very young age. The fixed versus the malleable mind set, our brain constantly changes by teaching them that to focus on the journey, on the effort, as opposed to the outcomes, as opposed the intelligence, was able to change their mind set.

So in ourselves we can focus on a reward on our effort, on our process, whether it’s failure or success. Active acceptance. It will always be part of us. You know one of the things that perfectionists very often do when they realize they are perfectionists and that is hurting them: they apply the perfectionist approach to overcoming perfectionism, which means, I will become perfect person who is committed to excellence. That doesn’t work. That’s just more perfectionism. But what active acceptance is about saying. Ok, So I’m not…So I’m still perfectionist. I will always probably have part of it in me. And that’s OK.

One of the things that Buddhists talk about is that very often, our greatest challenges, what we would call “our neurosis.” Whether it’s perfectionism, the fear of failure whether it’s anger that comes up once in a while, anxiety, whatever it is that we have- that “issue”. The Buddhists cognitively reframe it and say, “ we need to look at it as a tool, as a tool for growth, as a way of learning about ourselves, digging deep inside ourselves and growing.” So to look at it- OK, so this is an opportunity for growth, for personal learning, for reflection, for more empathy toward other people- whatever it is. But to look at it as a tool. Accept it. And then act.

The next thing, after we accept it, we go ahead and change it. And we go ahead and change it by introducing behavior. The key issue here is behavior.

2014.11.19

 

 

 

繼續前進

  這學期對我來說挺不錯的，沒有時麼東西讓我懊惱，進入校園讓人想再度接受挑戰，我現在知道了，應該更早研讀心靈，因為這個議題十分重要，它是如此根本與基礎的，因此當人們意識到，學期中很早就意識到，昨天有幾個人到辦公室來問我，「區別到底在哪裡？」在一、二個月之後，一個已達顛峰的人，管理著菁英學校，在承受了一生的壓力，不斷努力達到高點，不是享受當下，享受旅途，而是被告知要改變。

  我問一個簡單的問題，你要過甚麼樣的生活？積極的模式是甚麼？積極的人從外表看好像一模一樣，可能也是一個充滿雄心壯志的人，極度勤奮刻苦的人，是投資銀行家或醫生，或者律師，或者老師，或者在流浪者之家工作。從外表上看可能完全一樣，但其內在則是迥然不同。怎麼不同呢？區別在於追求卓越的人，也許同樣充滿雄心壯志，有相同目標，可能也達到了同樣的目標。然而此人同時享受旅程，這就是區別所在。

  熱情能感染他人，雖然從表面看，和之前描述的形象一模一樣，因此，不要失去雄心壯志，也不要變得沒有競爭力，學會享受過程，朝著有意義的目的，所邁出的步子才是最重要的。我們如何克服活在未來中的感覺？因為害怕失敗而害怕當下的感覺。這兒有一些方法：首先是認識他，認識到我想改變甚麼？我想保持甚麼？我到底想改變甚麼？因為長久以來，人們總是想著完美，想著成功，潛意識讓人無法擺脫完美主義，因為我會認為那就意味著，把寶寶和洗澡水一起沖走，也就是成功被沖走了。

  我仍然充滿抱負不要放棄成功，同時享受過程，這是最重要的認知，我繼續前進。

 

I can move forward

  This semester for me has been going great. There are very few things that I regret about not having done this semester, but there is one thing I will change next time when I come to school, that I already know of now is have the lecture on the mind body earlier. Because it is such an important topic. It is so foundational, so basic that when I realized that and that was earlier on this semester that I should have had it earlier, I should have had it earlier, you know,  a couple of people yesterday in office hours asked the question, “ so what is really the difference?” a month or two-too late perhaps a smart man gets to being literally on top of the world, overlooking excellence school, and then being informed after a life of constant stress, constantly living the future in point, not enjoying the present, the journey, is being told it is time to change.

  And I asked you a simple question, “what kind of life do you want for yourself?” What is the positive model? Now the positive model from the outside may look exactly the same. It may be a person who is extremely ambitions, a person who is extremely hard working, a person who is an investment banker or a doctor, or a lawyer, or a teacher, or working at a homeless shelter. It may look the exactly same from the outside. From the inside, it is radically difference. How is it radically difference? It that the person who is on the excellence side, may be as ambitious, may be have the same goals, may be reach the same goals. However, that person also enjoys the journey. That is the difference.

  Excitement can contagious others, even though from the outside, it may look the exact same as the “caricature” that I depicted earlier. So it’s not losing our ambition. It’s not about not being competitive. Learning to also enjoy the process, the step on the way to a destination that you deem valuable that is important to you.  How do we overcome this living in the future, being afraid of the present because what if I fail. There are a few methods: the first one is being aware of it, being aware of what I want to change and what I want to maintain. What it is that I want to change? Because for very long time, person associated with perfectionism, with also success, my subconscious were stopping me from letting go of perfectionism because I thought that also means throwing out baby with bath water, i.e.my success.

  I understand that I can still be as ambitious and not give up my success, and yet enjoy the process- that’s a better understanding. And now I can move forward.

2014.11.17

 

 

別為小事傷神

  「這是成長的工具，可以幫助我更好好地了解自己和他人」，這裡有三個P的選擇。

  第一個P就是讓自己成為一個人，如果我經歷了困難，我遇到了挫折，第一步就是給自己許可證，也就是說接受這樣的感覺，接受這個困境，接受這個現實，事情已經發生，我對此甚麼也做不了，能夠改變的只有我對他的詮釋，這時我就會進入下一個層次。

  第二階段是重建，也就是積極的，這就是積極者。這其中有甚麼亮點呢？這其中有甚麼成長機會呢？所以如果經歷了困境，也許可以用佛教的眼光來看待，

「這是成長的工具，這可以幫助我更好好地了解自己和他人」，成為一個更好的教育工作者，諸如此類。再次發現失敗中的亮點，失敗中的機會。

  我們很少提到的一個非常重要的技巧，粗略提到的就是分心，將注意力轉向別處，這不一定是件好事，有時執著於分析每種情感，感覺和想法，是有害的，反覆思考不一定是有幫助的。有時最好的方法，就是當消極的想法，或負面情緒出現時，將我們的注意力轉到別處去，聽聽音樂，跑個步，和別人聊聊這個事或別的事。這和逃避是很不一樣的，因為這並不是說好吧，我一輩子不要再管這種事了，這只是說如果某種情緒或想法反覆出現，永遠都在徒勞的抗爭，把石頭推上去，然後又被推下來，上上下下。

  有時更好更有用的方法是，好吧！「我不要再反覆想了，這沒有意義。這神經通路在我腦海中太強烈了，不會有任何出路的。」然後說讓我繼續前進吧！讓我聽首好歌，讓我去跑步，讓我能真正忘記它。經常地，跑步能使我以全新的角度來看待這件事。

  最後，第三個P是指轉換角度，這真的很重要，別為小事傷神，一切皆是小事。我不完全同意後半句，「一切皆是小事」，但很顯然，很多生活中我們為之傷神的都是小事。要不為小事傷神，就要問一個簡單的問題，它在一年後會不會有影響？從長遠來看，它真的很重要嗎？它真的值得我去擔心焦慮？為之沮喪，為之焦慮嗎？它在一年之後真的有影響嗎？

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

  This is a tool for growth; this will help me better understand myself as well as others .There are three Ps are the alternative.

  The first P is the Permission to be human. So if I experience a difficult experience, I have some…I go through a hard time. The first step is to give myself permission and that would mean accepting of the emotion, accepting that is difficult, accepting reality. Something just happened; there is nothing I can do about what had just happened. What can change is perhaps my interpretation of what had happened which is where I get to the next level.

 

  The Second Step, this is reframing, interpreting the situation as Positive. And that would be the benefit finder. What’s the silver lining here? What is the growth opportunity here? So if I am going through a very difficult time, perhaps look at it through the Buddhist perspective and say: “ well, this is a tool for growth; this will help me better understand myself as well as others, become a better educator, become a better business person, whatever it is. Seeing it again, the silver lining, the opportunity in failure.

  One very important technique that we didn’t talk about much, just in passing, is distracting, distraction, is looking toward other place. It’s not always good. In fact, sometimes detrimental to stay and analyze every single emotion, feeling, through that comes up. Ruminating in and of itself does not always help. Sometimes the best thing to do is when a negative thought comes up, or negative feeling comes up is to distract ourselves from it by, for example, going to listen to a piece of music, going for a run, talking to someone either about that or something else. Now this is very different from avoiding. Because it is not about saying, “all right, I am not going to deal with any of the issues in my life.” It’s just saying that if there is a recurrent thought or feeling, and I’m experiencing is Sisyphean battle against it-you know, pushing the stone up and being pushed down again, up and down again.

  Sometimes it is better, more helpful to just say, “ Ok, I’m not going to ruminate; it’s pointless. This neural in my mind is being so reinforced. It’s not going anywhere.” And then to say, “let me move on.” Let me listen to a nice piece of music. Let me go for a run that will really help get my mind off this.” And every often, what a run can do is also help me look at it in a different, through a different lens.

  And finally, the third P is about taking Perspective, this is really gonna matter. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff and it’s all Small Stuff. Now I don’t necessarily agree with the second-“ it’s all small stuff”, but certainly a lot of things that we sweat about in our lives are small stuff. Now the issue with not sweating the small stuff is asking a simple question: is this going to matter in a year? You know, in a large schema of things, does it really matter? Is it worth my worrying, and fretting, and being depressed and upset and anxious about this now? Is this really going to matter in a year?

2014.11.14

你必須嘗試

  我在教育圈工作許多年，發現在某些條件下，人如果置身於組織中，更有可能表現優異。某些條件，比如給予團隊明確可行的目標，建立有效的團隊結構，即時的組織支援，高效的訓練，當一個團隊具備了這些條件，就會表現得更出色。所以我工作有條理也非常努力，但結果恰恰相反，這簡直給幾十年的工作打了大大的耳光，因此我說「結果就是結果，現時就是現實」，生活得回到現場，理解這一現象。

  心理安全是一種感覺、經歷空間，讓人覺得可以在辦公室，在組織內，安全地討論錯誤與過失，讓你覺得摔倒了也能安全的站起來。有心理安全的組織，會表現比較好。許多研究證明有心理安全的團隊，他們的成員不會害怕被告密，也不怕摔倒或犯錯，這些組織會更為成功，他們是學習型組織，成員不斷的學習成長，從錯誤中學習，下一次就能做得更好。

  不論是領導者或家長，要為自己的孩子營造心理安全，讓他們毫無拘束的告訴你，他們做得不好失敗的事，因為如果他們願意跟你說，就不容易進入害怕失敗的完美主義，會更快樂更成功。

  這是Thomas Watson 的故事，他是IBM的創建者，至今日仍舊每天不斷的改造，所以IBM能發展至今。IBM剛成立還在發展打字機時，有一名員工犯了策略性錯誤，給IBM損失了一百萬美元，當時對IBM來說是一筆很大的錢。於是他犯錯後第二天，去找了創辦人Thomas Watson並且給他一封信，Thomas Watson並且打開信讀了讀，問那員工說：這是甚麼？他說：先生，這是我的辭職信。為什麼辭職？先生，我剛犯了錯，為您的公司造成了一百萬美元的損失，我不想…你一直對我很好，我不想讓你煩惱是否要炒了我，所以我主動辭職。Thomas把信撕了說：炒了你？我剛為你的教育投入了一百萬美元，現在我要炒了你？不論這故事是百分之百真實或部分真實，在IBM公司廣為流傳，在IBM公司應造良好的氛圍，告訴大家，你必須嘗試。

You Have To Try

   I’m done work on an education teams, on groups for many years. And what I found was there are certain conditions that if they are put into place in an organization, the group is more likely to perform well. Certain conditions, such as a clear, engaging goal for the team, for the group, such as an enabling team structure, such as supportive organization, such as effective coaching. When a group has these conditions in place, it will not only perform better. So I’m very methodical, very hard working. But they are significant in the opposite direction. Again this the phase of decades or work. And I said, “well, a result is a result; reality is reality. We have to go back to the field. We have to understand this phenomenon.”

   Psychological safety is the feeling, the experience, the space that you feel in your workplace, in your organization where you are safe talking about errors and mistakes, where you feel safe falling down and getting up again. And these organization with their own psychological safety, they performed better. Many research showing how groups organizations with their psychological safety with their employees don’t or are not afraid of whistle blowing or not afraid of falling down of making mistakes. These organizations are significantly more successful. These are learning organizations with the employees constantly learn and grow. Or you learn from your mistakes and then the next time you are able to do better.

  Whether it’s for leaders, whether it’s for parents, would you have this psychological safety for your kids, while they feel comfortable talking to you about things that they did not do well, about failures. Because if they do feel comfortable, they are much less likely to enter into this perfectionistic fear of failure. And they are much more likely to be happier as well as successful.

   This is a story about Thomas Watson, founder of IBM, one organization that he invented and reinvented itself numerous times-continues on the daily basis. And that’s why it survives. So there was an employee are the beginning when IBM was founded, when they were making type writers, an employee made a strategic error. And the error was that he actually lost IBM a million dollars and a million dollars at that time for IBM was a lot of money. So the next day, after he made that mistake, he comes to see Thomas Watson, the founder and gives him a letter. Thomas Watson opens the letter and reads it and look at the employee and says, “ what is this?” He says, “ sir, it’s my letter of resignation”.”Why resignation?” “ Sir, I just made a mistake that cost your organization a million dollars. I don’t want…you’ve been great to me. I don’t want to put you through this difficult experience of firing me. So I’m resigning”. Thomas took the letter and tore it and said, “Fire you? Fire you?”I’ve just invested a million dollars in your education and I’m going to fire you? Now whether this story is exactly true, or almost true, it’s still that circulates around IEM, and a story that creates a certain reality in IBM, a reality that says” you have to try”.

2014.11.12

 

真理的實踐

推動世界前進的重任 並不是由完人來進行的

中文「危機」，由兩部分組成，第一部分「危」字指危險；第二部分「機」代表機會。有失敗的危險，但有危險的地方，就能學習成長。

Elbert Hubbard說過，一個人能犯的最大錯誤，就是害怕犯錯。這裡有一個例子，有一個人犯錯，失敗了一次又一次，我給他失敗大王稱號，原因如下：22歲時剛找到工作就失業了，不是辭職，是失業。23歲時他決定投身政治，因為其他工作他都不在行，但是也沒有成功，於是繼續回去經商，又沒有成功。27歲時壓力太大，他崩潰了，精神崩潰。但又重新站起來了，7年後他34歲時，競選國會議員，名落孫山，沒有成功。39歲時，還沒有學乖，又一次競選議員失敗，他說，讓我試試更高層的。46歲時真失敗，還沒有學乖，沒關係，學會失敗，從失敗中學習。你都46歲了適可而止吧!到了47歲他試圖競選副總統，還沒學乖，又失敗了。到了50歲他試圖競選參議員，他幾乎想放棄了，但最終他沒有，到了51歲，他成了美國第16任總統-林肯總統。大概是美國歷史上最有影響力的總統，他談起這段經歷時說「失敗讓人痛苦」，當然他的確有成功過。

我們簡化了他的生平，失敗讓人痛苦，他不享受失敗，但還是挺過來了。因為和歷史上其他成功者一樣，他懂得「學習別無他法，成長別無他法」。

成功別無他法，愛迪生說過，我從失敗中走向成功。嘗試與失敗，嘗試、失敗與成功，再次失敗，再次嘗試。「推動世界前進的重任，並不是由完人來進行的」，準備失敗，放手去做，放手行動，允許自己失敗。

My Experiments with Truth 

The important work of moving the world forward

 does not wait to be done by perfect men

 

 “Wei Ji”, the Chinese character for crisis, has two parts: the first part is danger-this is the front character; the after character, opportunity. There is danger of failing. And wherever there is a crisis, to learn and grow.

Elbert Hubbard: The greatest mistake a man can make is to be afraid of making one. These is an example of a person who had made mistakes, who failed time and time and again. I’m giving him the position of ultimate failure. And here is why: At the age of 22, already-just started a new job, lost it. Didn’t leave – he lost it. At the age of 23, decided to go into politics because he wasn’t doing well in other jobs. But didn’t make it there either. And then he went back to business, didn’t make it there. At the age of 27, it was just too much for him. Just too much- and he collapsed. Had a nervous breakdown. But then got up again after falling. And at the age of 34, 7 years after his nervous breakdown, he ran for congress- wasn’t even close. Didn’t make it. At the age of 39, hasn’t learned the lesson yet. And he was defeated again for congress. And then he said, ”let me go try higher.” At the age of 46, what a loser! Doesn’t learn, does he? OK. Yeah. It’s OK. Learn to fail. Fail to learn. But I mean you are 46 years old. C’mon! Give it up already. At the age of 47, he tried to be nominated for the vice President. Didn’t learn. Didn’t make it. So at the age of 50, he tried again for Senate. And then he almost gave up. But he didn’t. And at the age of 51, he became the 16^th President of the United States- Abraham Lincoln President. Arguably the most important President this country has ever had. And through it all and he talks about it,” It was difficult to fail.” Of course he had victories.

We simplified the process. It was difficult to fail. He did not enjoy failing. But he persisted it. Because he understood just like every other successful person throughout history has understood and understands : there is no other way to learn; there is no way to grow.

There is no way, Thomas Edison. Remember! “I failed my way to success”. Trying and failing, trying and failing and succeeding, and failing again, and trying again. “The important work of moving the world forward does not wait to be done by perfect men.” Be prepared to fail. Just do it! Just act! Yet gives yourself the permission to fail.

 

2014.11.11

 

 

 

 

 

學習成長沒有捷徑

 

  你知道心理學家在做甚麼嗎？心理學家觀察人，我常常在觀察，非常仔細的觀察，我看到了甚麼？這需要極高的洞察力、經驗及智慧，你知道我每次看到甚麼嗎？我看到所有的人走路非常優雅，了不起。好棒，你們值得表揚。但是問題來了，如果沒有成千萬次的摔倒，你們能走到這裡，能走得如此優雅嗎？這是不可能的，學會失敗，從失敗中學習。

  我們小時候都知道，我們摔倒了，我們可能會哭，但是馬上又站起來。摔倒了，還會笑。學習的喜悅，這種喜悅上哪兒去了？去哪兒了？他消失了，因為我們到了一定年紀開始意識到別人在看我們，開始產生種種想法。「我不要試，萬一摔倒怎麼辦？」呃，不、不，我不要演這齣戲，萬一沒人看懂怎麼辦？呃，我不要分享經驗，萬一有人不喜歡怎麼辦？或者大家都這麼聰明，那我就不獻醜了。我們開始逃避而不是應對，這會影響我們自尊、信心、樂觀精神，長期的快樂指數。學會失敗，從失敗中學習。

  不是放棄志向或者努力工作，也不是消除失敗時的痛苦，這是不可能的。而是獲得一種更理性、更有益、更可控制的處理失敗的方法。上台需要一定的勇氣，有勇氣並不代表不害怕，而是害怕但仍然勇往直前。

  當老師有一件事是我不喜歡做的。我是老師，我喜歡教書，但有一件事是我不喜歡做的，就是打分數，我討厭打分數。但做為老師不得不做，你必須打分數。我有一個重要的問題，如果沒有成千上萬個失敗的圓，你能畫出一個真正的圓嗎？當然不能，成功沒有捷徑。學會失敗，從失敗中學習，這是唯一的途徑。

  但記得是如何學習的，別無他法，成長沒有捷徑，學習也沒有捷徑，樂觀、快樂、成功更沒有捷徑。

 

No other way to grow  

No other way to learn

  You know what a psychologist do? Psychologists watch people. And I watch you every time, And I watch very closely. What I see? This takes a lot of insight, experience, wisdom, but you know what I see every time when you come in? That you all are very good walkers. Terrific. Well done! Yes! You deserve it! Absolutely! But here is the question: could you have gotten to this stage, to being such good walkers without having fallen hundreds and thousands of times? It’s not possible. Learn to fail or fail to learn.

  And as kids, we know it. We fall down and maybe we cry a little bit if it hurts, but we get up again. We fall down. And we laugh. The joy of learning. Where is it? Where is it? Where does it go? Well it goes away because we come to a certain age when we begin to understand other people are watching us, and then the image kicks in.” I’m not going to try, because what if I fall?” Oh, no no no. I’m not going to try for this play, because hardly anyone gets that. Oh, I’m not going to share, because what if they don’t like what I have to say. Or “everyone is so smart. I’m not going to speak up.” And we avoid instead of coping. And that affects our self esteem, our confidence, our resilience, our happiness levels in the long term. Learn to fail or fail to learn.

  Not giving up ambition, not giving up hard work, not giving up pain of failure- because that’s inevitable. But simple have a more rational, a more helpful, a more empowering approach toward failure. Remember it takes courage to come up to the stage, but courage is not about not having fear; it’s about having fear and going ahead anyway.

    The one thing that I really don’t like doing teaching. I love to teach, but the one thing that I really don’t like doing- is grading ,I hate grading. But you know, as a teacher, you have to do it, you have to do it. I have an important question for person, could you have gotten to drawing a real circle without having drawn hundreds and thousands of failed circles? Absolutely. There is no other way to succeed. Learn to fail or fail to learn- there’s no other way.

  But remember, remember how we learn. There is no other way, no other way to grow. No other way to learn. No other way to become more resilient, happier, more successful.

 

2014.11.09

 

 

 

皎潔的月光

我正在寫作時，我兒子要我翻轉既有的寫作模式

我是平凡的，我能拼讀也知道許多事，更知道許多美好字詞像是：

  迎風招展

  想像創造

  入神著迷

我想尋找更多有意義和有趣的事

我是一個

  守護者

  傾聽者

也是一個

  隱形者

我能讓自己既微小又安靜，藏身於許多地方守護著，也觀賞和傾聽。

除了母親，她發現我無所不在，我藏身時她看著我，穿越牆壁她還是看著我，但是她不阻止我，注視我，我將有更多展現！

(獻給母親)

 

More Perfect than the Moon

I am writing here now. My son Jerry says it is my turn to keep the journal.

I am almost in third grade. I can spell, you know. And I know many things, I also know many words, some of them important words. Like

  Windswept

  Imagination

  Ecstatic

I will have to look up the meaning and thing of ecstatic.

I am a watcher. I am a listener, too. I am invisible. I can make myself so small and quiet and hidden that sometimes no one knows I am here to watch and listen.

  Except for my mother. She finds me everywhere. She sees me when I’m hiding. Mother tells me she can through walls.

  But she won’t stop me.

  I will find lots to seeing about.

Watch me!

 

2014.11.07

 

 

此時此地

  人無時無刻不在改變，從很多方面看到自己的轉變，從完美主義到現在，這轉變還在進行，此時此刻正在發生，從完美主義轉換成追求卓越，這一轉變與我的快樂歷程緊密相連。我想分享個人的一些經歷，我每天早上6點起床用完早餐到學校，下班後我會去散步到晚上，才回家閱讀，然後睡覺，好幾年一直都是如此，好愉悅，好享受，尤其是間歇的學習，與同事一起成長。

  當時有一個信念，有一個願望，一個目標，一直支撐著我「要幫助他人」。我告訴自己，如果我達到了，我就得道快樂與平靜，一切付出都是值得。為什麼？因為只有付出才有快樂。

  我們想盡辦法把事情擠在一起做，以節省時間，我不知道你們怎麼樣，但我時間不夠，我時間越來越少了。假設我們能省出一堆時間，有了空閒，然後做甚麼呢？甚麼也不做。甚麼也不做，意義不是如此嗎？但以後的一堆時間是無法可以保證的，能控制的只有此時此地，所以拖延的感覺才這麼好。

  拖延不是問題，是解決方法，是全世界共同表達，停下，慢點，你太快了，聽聽音樂，甚麼，聽音樂。記住，現在就拖延，別延遲。

  1989年我通過小學校長甄試，我了解，只有付出才有收穫，我持續學習努力工作。1997年通過國中校長甄試，我欣喜若狂，人生從沒有如此快樂，那一刻我對自己說，付出終於有回報，都是值得的，我會更快樂。2004通過高中校長甄試，我對自己說，這是我的目標，我每天和同伴辛勤工作 我們辛勤工作，表現越來越好。

  人無完人，沒有人會處於極端的糟糕，也沒有人是極端的卓越，關鍵是如何變得更優秀，每個人都有志向，人生的歷程中走出的每一步，採取不同的方法與態度。

Here and Now

  Every time is a changing time. Changing in this time. In many ways, my shift, my journey from perfectionism and it’s an on-going journey, a journey that goes on right now as we speak, my journey from perfectionism to the pursuit of excellence is the most intimately linked with my journey toward becoming happier. So I want to share some personal things that I’ve been through. I would wake up at 6 am in the morning after breakfast and got to school. Right after school-it was next to a walk, and then late evening, I would go home, enjoy reading and then go to sleep. For tears, this was my pattern. It was pleasure. It was enjoying, especially the interval learning work out with my colleague.

    And I was sustained by the belief, by the vision, by my personal mission at the time of helping others. I said to myself, “I f I arrival this , then I’ll be happy; Then I’ll be calm. And it’s all going to be worth it.” Why? Because no pain, no gain.

    We are doing all these things to squeeze things together so we can save time. And I don’t know about you but I don’t have anymore time. I have less time. But let’s just say we could save up a whole chunk of time and set it aside. You know what we’d do with it? Nothing. Nothing at all. Isn’t that the point to be able to do nothing at all? But we’re not guaranteed that later on chunk of time. All I have is Here And Now and that’s why procrastination feels so right!

   Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution. It is the universe’s way of saying” Stop. Slow down. You move too fast. Listen to the music. Whoa whoa, listen to the music”. Remember this” PROCRASTINATE NOW. DON’T PUT IT OFF .

  In 1989, I reached the Primary School Principal Examination, I understand-no pain, no gain. And I continued to learn and work hard. In 1997, I through the Junior School Principal Examination, I was ecstatic, joyous, happier than I ever remember myself being. And at that moment, I said to myself “it all paid off. It was all worth it.” And at that moment I said to myself “it all paid off. It was all worth it. Because now I was ready to be happy.” In 2004 I through High School Principal Examination again, I said, “ this is my goal, this is my objective.” And I work hard every single day with my partners, we work harder and harder. And we got better and better.

  Now there is no perfectionist, there is no one person who is on the extreme, nor there is a person who’s on the excellence extreme. The key is how do become great, everyone have ambitious, having a different approach toward the journey of our life, toward each step of the way.

2014.11.05

 

 

行動影響態度

行動會影響態度，如何克服拖延？首先，最重要一點，很簡單，容易實踐且有效，人們稱之為五分鐘熱度，他們發現所有拖延者都有一個共同點，他們對行動的要求有所誤解。全世界的拖延者都以為，要有所行動必須先受到激勵，我必須感受到共鳴，才能思考解決問題。我必須有所靈感，才能下筆寫文學藝術論文。但事實並不是這樣，事實並不是這樣。

第一步並不是改變態度，即受到激勵然後行動，恰恰相反，要先開始行動，行動會慢慢影響態度，因為行動開始後我們會有慣性，或者有時候在90分鐘刺激中，我們需要重新五分鐘啟動。

  我非常喜歡教育，我喜歡教育心理學，有時候我早上起來，閱讀教育心理學論文或規劃學校活動，有時候我完全不在狀況，這讓我自己非常吃驚，是的，有時候我沒有心情起床，「這怎麼可能」？是的，我了解五分鐘熱度，有時候在90分鐘時間裡，我不得不再做一次五分鐘的暖身，因為我感到情緒不支，所以要花時間修復，不然我只是拖延情緒，我說沒事，就五分鐘，堅持住就行，這五分鐘往往會產生一個向上的螺旋，不是通過思想，不是通過心靈，而是通過行動。

Behavior will Affect our Attitude

Behavior will affect our attitude, for overcoming procrastination? First, most important one, simple, easy to implement and it works. It’s what they call” the 5 minutes take-off”. One of the things they found with, just about all procrastinator is that they have a misunderstanding of what it takes to act. Procrastinators, the world over, think that in order to act, they first need to be inspired. I have to feel the vibes, before I start the solve problem set. I really have to be inspired before I write this paper for Lit and Arts. But you know what? That’s not how it works. That’s not how it works.

It’s not about first changing our attitude. Becoming inspired and then acting. It usually works the other way around. We first need to start acting, behavior that will then affect our attitude. Because very often once we start, we are on a roll. Or sometimes, a few times, during let’s say the 90 minutes sprint, we have to restart the 5 minutes.

I am extremely, extremely passionate about education. I love educational psychology. But you know sometimes when I get up in the morning, and I write something about school activity or read educational psychology article. Sometimes I don’t feel like starting, you know, this is actually a very big surprise for myself. Yeah, sometimes I really don’t feel like getting up. “How’s that’s possible”? Yes, exactly! Because I know the 5 minutes take –off. And sometimes within a 90 minutes session, I have to do another 5 minutes take-off, because my energy levels are drained. So either take time off to recover, or if I think that is just procrastination. I say it’s OK. For 5 minutes. Just push. And very often that 5 minutes start an upward spiral. Not through the mind. Not through the heart. Through acting.